Jake Ludens’ Mental Environment

Last night after posting my blog I was striken with inspiration. As many of you know, I am very strange in that I read all of my spam email and all of my junk mail that I get in my mail box for the house. So last night while reading my junk box of my Gmail account, I thought what kind of story could I write using the subject lines from my spam email? I stayed up a little late and copied down all of the subject lines from the month of November that were in my junk account. (Disclaimer: Subject Lines are in Bold and the subject lines are in order of how they came in. If a spam came in multiple times in a row I only used it once.)

A Day in the Life of Spam

I got up this morning, much the same was as I always do, to the radio, but today instead of music I heard a commercial stating “Cash for seniors in this new option”. Wow, I thought, the economy must be really bad if people are now offering cash for seniors. I guess it is tough out there, all the career jobs are filled up and the standard response now is I saw your resume…please complete your application. Application? What happened to your resume should speak for itself, I haven’t filled out an application for a job since college. All I really want to do is create a way to Watch TV from around the world on your computer. Too bad that isn’t an option for a career. Maybe I will just Call Companies Direct and set up an Interview. I could do that all night long because I would be able to Type in the dark with: New illuminated Logitech Keyboard.

Suddenly I realized that if I did that I would never leave the house and everyone would be calling me saying, “Rid your Colon of weight and toxins”. Plus, the voice in my head was saying that, I would no longer enjoy my Second Chance to Enjoy Ebony Magazine purchased on your behalf.

I wish I knew all of the Hollywood Secrets to only working a few months out of the year or how to earn Cash from home? If you’re a senior homeowner Damn It! Another commercial telling me about seniors and cash. That is just wrong. Is anyone else Sick of the Recession Yet? Earn Thousands,Cash for seniors is a reality now I had to get out of the house, this seniors thing was out of control.

So I headed down to the coffee shop to see what the intellectuals were up to. I bought a cup of coffee at 7 Eleven and received a President Obama Gold Inaugural dollar as change. I was so happy because I knew how I could Make money on ebay and google with it. Why don’t they give these dollars as a scenario for seniors stops mortgage payments. That is a great idea,Barack Obama Inaugural Dollar. Uncle Sam could give you up to $25,000 open to see how. What a great Scenario for seniors stops mortgage payments. On top of that I started to wonder Why government auctions make sense for your budget.

This is crazy too, I have too much Hope for seniors and cash solution. I must have drunk too much coffee. I told myself that I should really be focused on how to Prevent foreclosure and protect your investment. Yet all I could think of was the quick cash I could get from building a home for seniors and cash solution.

I tried to forget about it, besides I didn’t know any seniors. If I had a cell phone at this point I would have started to Call companies direct and schedule job interviews. Instead I finally got to the coffee shop with my 7 Eleven coffee and was met by a woman who was super excited about how she got” LIFE:100 Events that shook our world-limited time offer and how she ordered her coffee with Acai Berry Supreme #1 Super Food.

I sat down in the corner of the shop to hide the fact that I bought 7 Eleven Coffee for a fraction of the price. My cheap coffee almost came out of my nose when I started laughing at another woman who was trying to Stay warm with the blanket with sleeves. Smart idea, she must have gotten one of those online graduate degrees from top colleges.

Just then a man sat down next to me because he noticed my cheap coffee. He said what if there were a lender designed for you? “Excuse me”, I said. The man responded, did you know you could get Cash for seniors turns for the good. I didn’t know what language this guy was speaking but once again I was reminded there is a good market for seniors.

The man introduced himself as Jack and he was in the business of Direct Lending looking for Commercial RE loans. However, business was slow for Jack and next he asked me “what about Gold Jewelry?Unwanted Jewelry?Get Cash Now”? Sorry I told him, I Don’t consolidate…completely eliminate your debt.However, I followed up by saying I was interested in cash for seniors turns for the good. But how would it work if I didn’t know any seniors? Jack gave some great advice,“Sign up for eharmony today for a free profile and find a window company now.”

I knew Jack knew what he was talking about, but to do these tasks I need to find a Sale on Select PC’s tonight only. The quicker I get started the quicker I could start making Cash for seniors turns for the good. While I was walking to the store that sole PC’s, I wondered why seniors we in such a demand, was it After warranty expired, engine broke?

My mind was spinning and telling me I needed to Enjoy Psychology today purchased on your behalf. The Government can help you get started today! Apply for a Federal Grant. That’s it, a Federal Grant. That way I could get a newsletter Update from Colorado Technical University. Everything was coming together, but was I only Looking to eliminate high cable bills?

Enough, I knew I needed to focus. I needed to look past the sign that read One-click access to schools awarding credit for military service. I have never been in the military, that ad didn’t apply to me.

What was I going to do? too many thoughts. 62, own a home? Stop paying mortgage now
entrepreneurs, Government Money is Available. AHHHH! I needed to Find out more how you could save and get out of debt. I have been told you must Find an online degree program that fits your goals!” If I could do that I could Find out how you could take control of your debt and how to get Cash for seniors turns for the good.

Cash for seniors, You will never find these deals at the dollar store. I finally got to the computer store and I had a great idea, Get 250 business cards, I could give them out to any seniors that I meet, then they could call me when they are ready to be sold for cash.

At the store there was a very attractive woman and she asked me, ”Would you like to Test and Keep a Hi Definition TV?” Wow, she must get paid a lot for what she does I thought. I bet with a job like that you could Discover how good it feels to wake up every morning knowing you won your car and you would have enough money to keep Looking for foreclosures. Could you imagine no Debt problems? You’ve got options with a job like hers.

Just then over the loud speakers in the store they said, “Congress gives seniors go ahead cash from house.” Holy cow, Congress is supplying the cash for seniors, this is my lucky day. I need to purchase my business cards and head over to the retirement home, there is a River of opt-in data.

I got to the retirement home and I caught up with the janitor who I knew from high school. The plan was why not Let your friends do the networking for you? After I bribed the janitor with some of the cash for all the seniors I ducked in to a room and saw a man with The world’s most comfortable jaw supporter he looked happy. However the janitor stopped me in my tracks and I said, Low on funds, you could get up to 1500USD and you can always find a Credit card matching search engine. He agreed and I was on my way again, dreaming of how to Enjoy Yachts International purchased on your behalf.

At this point I couldn’t believe that Congress gives seniors go ahead cash from house. This was a lot easier that coming up with a way to Call Companies and schedule interviews. I couldn’t wait to get earn all this cash, I remembered a sign I saw on the walk over, it said Cash in on Lenovo Employee Pricing til Monday. I had no idea what Lenovo was but if they had employees they were up on me. I hope Lenovo is the makers of that Incredible New Electric Pet Nail Trimmer. If I had one of those I could Get a career in public health

I walked out of the retirement home after getting lost and decided the best thing a high roller like my self could do is Treat yourself to a GPS Navigator. As I was walking around the corner I ran into a nurse for the retirement home and I couldn’t help but ask if she had heard Congress gives seniors go ahead cash from house and that with seniors After Warranty expired, engine broke

She responded by asking me if this was how I planned to Turn your debts into wealth and never worry about money again? Why don’t you Get matched with quality online schools and earn money? She told me that is what her family did. “We buy houses fast” she said.

She then asked me, “Who do you match with eharmony could help you know?” Actually I told her, I match with the girl at the computer store who asks “Would you like to test and keep a hi definition tv”. Good for you the nurse said, “now don’t forget that Congress gives seniors go ahead cash from house and go take that girl a Low carb oreo flavored shakes and atkins bars-on us.

Wow, I said, how do you have so much money, you are just a nurse. Oh she said, “I Get a government grant that comes from your tax dollars and study Benefit information for Military Members.

By this time had no idea what the nurse was talking about. The only thought I had was about the Incredible New Electric Pet Nail trimmer. Frustrated I tried to focus, Financial Success can be yours start today I thought. You could graduate online in 1.5 years and You could get matched with a trusted student load relief partner.

Enough of that nonsense today was the day to Get your piece of history today by selling seniors. This was my only way to Stop Living paycheck to Paycheck.

______________________________
I think I just created Mad Libs for SPAM Subject Lines.

This is the opening lyric to Bad Religion’s “Positive Aspect of Negative Thinking” off of their 1990 album Against the Grain.

Today reading about the factory workers in Chicago protesting the loss of their jobs, I really started wondering if this is the next evolution in the way we see businesses competeing in the global market place. Let me explain. From the article that I read on Yahoo, it stated that -

JPMorgan Chase & Co. plans to contribute $400,000 to Chicago’s Republic Windows & Doors LLC.

So what is so uncommon about this? Well atleast up ’til now we have seen large numbers like this fly across headlines almost daily, millions, billions, these numbers are so large that individuals really don’t need to concern themselves with them. But here is the difference about this, the reason this company was forced to close down and give their employees only three days notice is because Bank Of America, a competitor of Chase bank, would not grant the company the credit it needed to keep its doors open (no pun intended).

$400,000 is not that large of a sum for companies of this size, however what Chase Bank just did was marketing genius. Essentially, they purchased a $400,000 ad spot that reached every newspaper and news website’s homepage. The message was, “hey look at us, we are so stable that we can afford to help make a happy holiday for the ex-employees of a company our competitor forced to shut down.” They look like a hero in the financial mess that our country and the world is in. Even in their press release they state that they do not expect any of this contibution to return to them. However, it will. It will in the 250 employees of Republic Windows and Doors who have now just switched banks to the one who just gave them an extra paycheck. It will in the hundreds more who are in fear of their own banks closing and are in search of stability. It will in the thousands more who are hoping for a lottery style payout from Chase.

Has the old beast of marketing stategy and creative advertising finally been killed by the simple buying of customers?

Several years ago, John, Jason and I joined up with the 30 Day Challenge, not the 30 day blog challenge that we are in the middle of now. Rather the 30 Day Challenge that is hosted by Ed Dale and several of his friends. In a nutshell, the 30 Day Challenge started out at a contest to see which affiliate marketer could make the most money in 30 days from affiliate channels. I will be honest and say that I have started several 30 Day Challenges and have never finished the full 30 days of courses that goes along with the challenge. I do watch Ed’s Videos and have an rss feed still live from his blog. However, it usually takes me a lot longer than 30 days to review all the content. It is a great resource for learning new tools and I thank Ed and his group for taking the time to post all the great information.

Yet one thing that always bothered me about the 30 Day Challenge was that while it is a great introduction to many of the tools available to online marketers, it created an army of “re-posters” and traffic exchanges. It created a lot of what I see as false traffic that really didn’t go to any product or service. Sure some people made few dollars selling e-books, or selling ad space on a site that had generated a lot of hits. The fact was that there was no substantial customer audience because no one was creating anything, most of the traffic was other 30 Day Challenge participants checking out each others sites, blogs, and now twitter posts. Sorry, I have great friends, but none of them want to buy anything from me.

This is why when I got an email from Ed this morning, bringing this very point to life, I was relieved. Thanks Ed. Here is a excerpt from the email.

And like the first point, I may have had a bit to do with creating
a problem!

I love leverage. “What’s new!”, I hear you say.

The ability to be a gatherer of information and then distribute to
your target market is a powerful weapon indeed. Like all weapons,
pointing it directly at your head is a health hazard.

If all you do in life (or perhaps more importantly from my
perspective, in your market), is be a “re-tweeter” or a
transmitter of other’s information. How do I say this… I believe
the technical term is…

“You’re stuffed”

I’m afraid you’re not going to get anywhere. It is only the people
who create content (or of course, products) that get ahead! Think
about it. It’s all very well being the neighborhood gossip and
passing on information to all and sundry (let’s face it, the
neighborhood gossip has their place) but they are only ever going
to be the gossip and eventually that gets tired and old.

From a financial perspective, “you’re stuffed”.

This should not discourage anyone from checking out the 30 Day Challenge and signing up, but keep in mind if you truly want to make money or simply to get a message out there, don’t get caught up.

I repeat, don’t get caught up in the “socialness” of social networks and social tools. Take a step back and realize that while it is great to have your buddies follow you on twitter, if you are just swapping each other links all day, who is the customer? where is your customer?

Last night I made a blog post about Greasecar.com and their use of a very poor slogan. After that we ordering a pizza and I started reading my newest issue of FastCompany. In this issue there is an article from Dan Heath and Chip Heath about the slogan, entitled “Kill the Slogans Dead”. Dan and Heath are the authors of Made to Stick, a book that should be a staple in your library.

The article hit on the idea that there is a lot of time wasted on groups coming up with worthless slogans and that slogans are no longer a valuable asset to a brand. I think that we have become so used to cleaver slogans that we look right past them. Marketers have realized this for awhile now and pushed another phenomenon that I am not sure what to call. It is the use of versions, sequals, types, 2.0, and other descriptors. If you aren’t following what I am describing, just watch cable television for about 10 minutes. CSI:Miami, CSI NY, CSI Torrington, Wyoming.

When I started in the Internet marketing world, it was all the craze to start naming the versions of your websites in the same manner that software developers have been doing all along, and thus was born Web 2.0. Wait a minute is Web 2.0 really a new form of slogan? It has the properties of a slogan in that it is creative, following the trend of the products it is associated with. Yet, it doesn’t describe what Web 2.0 is or how it can be used. Since Web 2.0 has been used so loosely as a buzz word, I think Web 2.0 really has become a new form of brand slogans.

Ok, so now we have an example of a slogan and a descriptor that really doesn’t fit and this is my point and what I think all marketers need to start thinking about. No longer can you put together just another cleaver slogan that is catchy and will stick with people. Now, with all of the worthless wording that is being thrown at customers, a brand name can still benefit from a slogan being associated with it, but that slogan needs to create buzz itself or at least thought.

Here is an example, if I decided to start using this as my brand and slogan, “JakeLudens.com Part of Web 3.2″, the audience that I have for my blog would be intrigued and wondering how I became part of Web 3.2, when most have only heard of Web 2.0. This would be much more beneficial than if I started using, “JakeLudens.com Purpose. Profit. Perfection.” Most of you would just look right over this and view my blog as just another WordPress Blog.

So is the slogan dead? Does it need to be killed? No it isn’t dead, but the old way of using slogans needs to be killed and no more time needs to be spent thinking up cleaver slogans, time needs to be spent making slogans that make brands cut through competitive marketing efforts and tell audiences who the brand is and what it can do for them. We now have a market place where customers are very conscience of how they spend their money and the customer’s needs taking over the focus of the customer’s need to be cool.

I saw my first vegetable oil powered car yesterday. It was a small red truck with the URL www.greasecar.com

I checked out their website and the first thing that I read was their tag line “Save Money! Help the Environment! Reduce America’s need for foreign oil!”

This might be the first time I have ever read a tag line that was so political. I fully support the use of alternative energy and I just don’t think that political slogans are the best way to attract the public to a new concept such as driving your car on vegetable oil.

Today was a day full of shopping and overhearing things that were really out there, but I’ll get to that in a minute. First of all I would like to thank everyone who came out last night to our first Friday get together. While we didn’t make it too late of a night I was a little slow this morning

I got up this morning and worked around the house for a bit and then Diane and I headed out to do some shopping and grab lunch. Sounds simple enough for a Saturday. We went to Town Square here in Las Vegas and had lunch at The Yard House. (Awesome French dip sandwich!) Here is where it starts getting strange. While we are eating our lunch, the restaurant is mostly empty, but soon people just start filing in and we were surrounded. A couple sits down next to us and they both order a beer. The guy suddenly realizes that he doesn’t have his debit card to pay and freaks out. “When did you have it last?” the girl asks. “At the ATM last night, I must have left it, I am going to go see if it is still there, I’ll be right back.” And the guy leaves to go check an ATM machine. Really? does he think that no one else has used the ATM machine at Town Square since he was there the night before?

Okay, I let that one slide. Diane and I continued shopping and then later that afternoon we stopped in to a small wine bar call The Grape. Diane ordered her favorite glass of wine and I ordered a St. Peter’s Cream Stout. Just down from where we were sitting was a couple that had to be on their first date. Since the place was empty we could hear every word of their conversation. At one point in their conversation, the guy says to the woman, “Well you see, I make really bad decisions.” This was followed up shortly after by, “I have a very bad personality.” Now I am no match maker or love guru, however, I have a feeling that this guy is having a rough spell in his dating career.

At one point Diane and I were laughing out loud over the conversation that we could hear going on, and we came to the conclusion that sometime when people are really nervous their “inside” voice starts talking out loud. We headed out from The Grape and headed back close to home. We stopped in at Target for some more holiday shopping and picked up a rat to feed Sable, Diane’s python.

We decided to stop for a quick snack and to watch the Oklahoma game at a bar called Bilbo’s and this is were the sound bites were out of control. At the end of the bar was a cowboy from Texas who had been into the sauce for a few hours and was all smiles. The conversation turned to talk about how to make the hottest chicken wings. The bartender won with a hot wing sauce that consisted of pickled jalapeno pepper juice, cayenne pepper, crushed red pepper, hot wing sauce, and almost every spice that they had in the kitchen. After he explained his creation the cowboy at the end of the bar pipes up and says, “Damn son, that will make you reach for an ice cream cone to wipe with in the morning.” I howled out loud with laughter.

Next it was half time of the game and Dr Pepper sponsors a contest where students can win a $100,000 scholarship. Once again the cowboy gets in the mix and says, “Look at that kid, he is like what has God done for me, Dr Pepper just game me a 100K.” God has nothing on great advertising.

Back at the house now watching the new Chris Rock stand up special. Talk about the great things people say, I highly recommend watching this.

Wow, this is strange making a blog post so early in the day. It is First Friday here in Las Vegas and the weather is great in comparison to what I hear it is like back in Wyoming today.

For any of you who are not familiar with the Las Vegas First Friday events, check out the MySpace Page.

Even though our offices are not an official part of First Friday, we like to open up our office doors for a few hours to help bring our friends and clients down to support the First Friday events and the Las Vegas art scene. Old downtown Las Vegas has always been my favorite part of Vegas and the city has been doing a lot lately to renovate and make it the “happening spot” it is known for.

Since we are in the Holiday Spirit, we have a great theme for this month’s get together, Beanie’s. We were also lucky enough to get some great prizes donated for the Best, Ugliest and who knows what else. We also will have buckets for clothing donations if anyone wants to get rid of some stuff.

Well, I need to finish up some work and look forward to see everyone downtown tonight. Oh and since JohnHawkinsUnrated.com decided to Rick Roll me this morning in my comments section for yesterday’s post, I need to come up with a really good prize / payback.

Oh and last but not least – there is a Twitter Meet Up as part of tonight’s get together. If you aren’t familiar with the greatness that is Twitter, come on down and we can help explain it’s benefits.

I honestly think I have come up with my very own disorder. Now I just need a good pitch for the pharmaceutical companies. I know, I will use my real life story as the basis for my marketing pitch. Here it goes..

“Do you ever find yourself spaced out? trying to do five things at once? forgetting to spell check your Twitter messages? Well you may suffer from what is known as I, OD. That’s right you are not alone. Thousands of tech savvy people just like you also suffer from Idea Overload Disorder.”

Well what do you think? It could sell right? I mean after all Acid Reflux Disease and Restless Leg Syndrome didn’t even exist in the 90′s.

Actually, this isn’t far for the truth. Over the last 6 years the speed of the innovation on the Internet is not something that anyone could have kept up with or can keep up with now. One of the most difficult things that I have found to do is to focus in one direction when building new projects or improving old ones. Why? No, it isn’t because I drink to much coffee or can’t finish things I start, it is because there are some many solutions available for every question. I mean think about how many ways there are to change the color of your font in a blog post.

I am constantly looking for ways to stay focused on the project at hand. I start with To Do Lists (I love lists), then there is the Thunderbird Calendar, then there is the break down of what can I get done first, second, third, before next Winter. Needless to say it still gets chaotic.

So my post tonight really isn’t very deep, it is more a cry for comments. What tricks do you use to help combat being pulled away to every tinyurl that comes up on Twitter, Facebook, Email, Phone, Feed……? or Maybe I just suffer from I, OD.

Today while I was working on one of our client’s new websites and in between Twitter posts and IM’s, I came up with an idea for a new project. Don’t worry you will all get a glimpse of it soon. With this new idea I needed to come up with a new logo and I did so tonight with some help for two great sources of inspiration.

The first being a book that I grabbed off of the shelf at the office called Logo Lounge. My brother picked up this book a while back and I have seen several like it before. However, I highly recommend this one since it is simple. It consists of all types of Logos from all over the world and the book is categorized into styles of logos such as Typography, Initials, People, Birds, you name it. I went through this book tonight for about an hour looking at logos, some familiar others not so. I finally put the book down because I was getting frustrated thinking about how I didn’t want to “rip off” a logo from a product that already existed.

Instead, I started watching the Food Network and eventually found my way back to my laptop to give it another go. All the time Diane had been sitting on the couch taking apart dozens of picture frames that she has been collecting from thrift stores, clearance racks and the occasional yard sale. Since before we had moved in to the new house, we have had the idea to decorate our house with strange vintage advertisements, hence the collection of frames. To help with decor, Diane’s parents found two very old issues of LIFE magazine and gave them to us over Thanksgiving. How old? 1936. Oddly enough, beat up 1936 LIFE magazines are really not that valuable in terms of resale. What they are valuable in are the number of great advertisements inside of their pages.

Diane had carefully taken each issue apart and divided the ads into groups, Hygiene, Liquor and Oppressed Women. She then pitched each ad to me as if we were in an episode of Mad Men to see which ones I felt would be acceptable for the house. Don Draper, eat your heart out. Some I liked, others were just dull, or too hard to understand. One thing I did notice, advertisers used a lot more ad copy in the 30′s. When all was said and done we had decided on over a dozen new ads and Diane had them framed up. Looking at this new collection, it hit me how simple the logos for these companies really are, Johnnie Walker, Royal Typewriters, Electrolux, and even Ex Lax. All of these have simple logos made up of only great typography, no icons needed.

I booted up Photoshop and I had a new logo for my new project finished in a matter about 10 minutes. I love when inspiration hits and it makes you want to stay up all night coming up with more ideas.

All I have to do is post this photo and many of you are going to go crazy remembering all the great things you have gotten for the holidays over the years. Are you ready?

Ok to be honest I just wanted Jason’s ADD to really kick in tonight. (you’re welcome Jason!) This is a photo of just some of the great toys that I have been going through the past two nights.

On to a new topic for day 2 of the 30 day blog challenge. Lets see what could I blog about? I know Twitter! No I am not a guru, I will leave that up to John, however I do want to mention that according to the people in the know, my Twitter Nerd Level went up today because I set up a new Twitter account for Black Diamond Digital. Not that setting up a Twitter account is difficult, but what I did notice today is how effective a really well designed background image for Twitter can be.

Today we were able to create a Twitter page that really reflected the new direction that Black Diamond Digital is going. We blended our logo, colors and the newest model that was just in the studio a few days ago. Check it out and let me know what you think.

To take it a step further I was able to tie the images together with an eblast of an upcoming event that we are hosting. Same model, completely different design element, but still kept the the attitude that we wanted for Black Diamond Digital. I uploaded the eblast here.

Next, I updated the Black Diamond Digital Blog with all of the same updates and links. I did all of this in the matter of only a few hours and was able to reach three different audiences, from C level executives to just my crazy friends that have no problem wearing a ridiculous beanie for any occation, to Twitter users who may never set foot in Las Vegas.

This is a perfect example of the new age of advertising, direct market reach with little to no cost.